I don’t mean book stuff so if you’re only here for the book turn back now because I’m mad.
Now, I’m mad a lot. On a none serious note, I’m still pretty pissed McDonald’s took off the strawberry lemonade because “it’s a summer drink”. Fuck you McDonald’s it is on all season drink, strawberry lemonade NEVER goes out of season.
On a serious note, I’m made about more things.
I hear a lot of things in my school. A lot of “jokes”. About rape. About race. About disability. About genders. About sexuality. About religion.
Yeah. A lot of “jokes”.
These things are “funny”.
Some of you may know I used to be a member of the JROTC program. A lot of white kids who were fond of the N-word, which I was never able to say even when given “permission”.
One of the turning points, when I just knew I couldn’t take it anymore was when one of the upperclassmen made a rape “joke” where the victim was a child. An infant. And they all laughed. Some said, “hey man, you’re going to hell.” While chuckling nonstop.
I don’t think I ever really paid attention to the things they said. But that shook me quite a bit.
It was just so awful.
And look at me now. Angry.
It wasn’t just that they laughed at a child being raped (although that was a pretty big part of it), but that they laughed at rape at all. As if it’s some joke. Because, holding someone down, crying, begging, maybe even just paralyze with shock or fear, someone who doesn’t want to, who hasn’t given consent, is okay, a joke, funny.
Of course, they aren’t traumatized for life. No, they won’t have to live with the shame and guilt. (If you aren’t hearing my sarcasm get out, you sick and twisted person, and get help).
Someone pokes you and you say “OMG stop raping me!” while giggling…. Dehumanizing the problem.
I’ve always been a little unnerved by the lack of boundaries some people have. Of the few guys who’ve ever attempt to hit on me, all of them have done something that just seemed out there. No, they never touched me without my consent, but it was still something that amplified my fear.
That fear that someday somebody is going to touch me without my consent. And I won’t be able to tell anyone. Because who will believe me? I just want attention. My clothes were a little provocative. I was smiling flirtatiously. Of course, I wanted this to happen, right? For no one to believe me. To be dehumanized.
Now, please don’t mistake me. I’m don’t want you all to talk this as an “If that ever happens, please tell me.”
I want you all to realize this is an issue.
On top of that, I want you all to see and acknowledge the other issue.
At the beginning, I talked about all the “jokes” I heard. They’re part of the problem. Because people either don’t talk about it or they joke about it. And when you joke, it isn’t a problem. It’s a joke. It’s “funny”.
“Haha, rape.” “Haha, racism.” “Haha, gay.”
They aren’t people anymore. They’re a joke. Their struggle isn’t really anymore. You’ve just dehumanized them.
Don’t get me wrong, I know it’s hard. Friends make these “jokes”. It makes it harder to be friends with someone who dehumanizes people for the sake of a laugh.
It makes it hard for others to be friends with you (with me) when everything offends me.
I know this kid, who is one of the most offensive kids ever. He knew of all the things that offended me. I used to go through his phone and he’d make sure I never saw them, which was nice, but it still bothered me that they were there.
Maybe, I’ll just die alone, an angry, spiteful woman, who was always angry that she didn’t shout loud enough for anyone to listen. Or that she didn’t shout enough.
And believe me, I’m angry about all of it. I don’t understand it, I’ve never experienced it (yet). But it’s still an issue that needs addressing.
Don’t even get me started on the Confederate Flag. I’ve developed an argument in case of “It isn’t racist, it’s southern pride.” come at me auntie’s.
Please, you guys. I want peace and happiness A LOT. But it’s really hard when so many are screaming and just as many (who could help) are ignoring them.
Well, did I make sense?
PS: Like I said, I’ve never actually experienced any of this, so if you know something that may further my knowledge, please *respectfully* tell me. I want to know.