Author-Blogger Friendships

Are the scariest thing in the world to me.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my authors, sometimes to the point of slight stalkerishness (*side eyes Jodi*), but the idea of being friends with them is just like Spongebob to me:

Because, as much as I love them, I don’t want them to hate me because I didn’t like one of their books, which is always a possibility.

I don’t want to be all love-y with them then give their book a three star or lower. I want to love it and I want them to love me for loving it.

So, I always get nervous when reading something an author I love wrote.

And I get especially nervous when we become buddy-buddy.

As much as I LONG to be buddy-buddy with an author, I don’t want to not like one of their books and they’ll disown me because of it.

That’s why I love authors like Sarah J. Maas. She’s kind, she’s friendly, she recognized me, but we’re not buddies, she doesn’t follow me. If I gave one of her books a not-so-swell rating, it wouldn’t affect anything in our relationship, because we don’t have one!

And you all may be thinking “Cat, that’s a stupid fear, it’s irrational.” But it isn’t. Just recently a case like this showed up and while it is rare, but it’s a possibility and I don’t want it to be me.

Plus, it should be stupid and that’s the thing.

You see, in my opinion, a person shouldn’t be an author if they can’t take criticism. Including from friends and family.

Someday, I want to  be published. And I know, I KNOW not everyone is going to like what I write. (Sometimes, I don’t even like what I write, but that’s because my characters have minds of their own…)

I’ve gone through so many mental situations of my friend not liking one of my books or my family not liking it, just so I can come to terms early, in case of being published.

But, honestly, being an author is putting your work out there and people are going to have different views of it, some will like it, some won’t, and just because you’re close to a person, doesn’t mean they’re going to like it.

This is just something I feel like all writer people, especially those who are or want to be published, come to terms with.

It sucks, I know. But it’s life, when you’re a creator. Not everyone will like what you create.

So, yes, my fear of being friends with an author should be stupid. (Partially because of the first thing, but also, slightly because I don’t think many want smol, bby blogger as a friend. Not a good marketing ally).

OR, sudden thought, maybe that’s it. Maybe, you can’t be friends when you’re purpose for friendship is a marketing one. (Wouldn’t that be business, though?)

I don’t know. Well, what I do know, is if it’s a friendship, things like that shouldn’t affect it.

Personally, even if your friend doesn’t love your work, someone else out there is bound to love it, or at the least enjoy it.

This is an objective place, writing is an objective career, you win some, you lose some and that is always important to remember.

And, as much as I REALLY want an author friend, my panicked ways will probably always get in the way.

(I’m eternally scared of giving an awful review, when I know others loved it, or I like the author, or so on.)

People can be friends with who they want, so I’m all down with people being friends with authors, I just don’t know how to interact with them, so IF you have an author friend, more power to you!

Bottom line, it’s okay, it happens, but it is a friendship, so when it comes to work (because writing is work and blogging is, actually, work) you just have to be respectful.

(You’ve got to have respect in any relationship, but this is in terms of author-blogger…)

Hopefully, I got my views and thoughts across in a kind and respectful manner, sorry for rambling on!

Peace and blessings,

-Kit Cat

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3 thoughts on “Author-Blogger Friendships

  1. The only person not allowed to love my books is my mother. I don’t think you should ever be afraid to voice your opinion. If anything, yours might be the kindest 1 or 2 star I’d get, because you do know that there’s another person on the other side of the page and you care about their feelings. How grateful I would be for that kindly worded one star review!

    As an author, I have a little bit different of a stance on these. I just stopped posting reviews that weren’t gushing because I stopped reading books that I wasn’t digging. I don’t publicize what I’m reading until I’m completely finished with it, either. But that’s because I don’t want people to think that I’m tearing down my peers.

    But for you, lovely kit-cat, review away!

    Like

  2. This is so spot on and I can absolutely relate. I love becoming friendly/friends with authors, but the legitimate fear that you might not like their book is scary. There’s been times when I literally couldn’t read the book because I was so scared I wasn’t going to like it or I started and I was liking it because I was so scared of not LOVING it as much as I loved the author, you know? But you’re right, a true author friend would recognise that not every book is going to be everyone’s cup of tea. If that reader happens to be a close pal, it certainly makes things tricky, but that’s life. In the end, do what’s right for you.

    Like

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